[AltoHombre]

Just a quick report, wanted folks to know I was back. Had a great time, really enjoyed it. I stayed with my novia Luza, in Palmira for most of my short trip. She and her family are really lovely people and I'm a very happy man.

Right now, I'm hoping to get back toward the end of May beginning of June. Her birthday is June 2d and she asked if I could return then. I"d really like that.

When I get to my trip report, it's going to be less about the Cali and Palmira, and more about the mechanics of the trip. That's because I spent all my time with one woman, and most of it at her house and the home of her Tia.

There are some interesting aspects to my trip, things I have to think about for a bit. But overall it was positive. I also have to say at this point that I've probably discarded most of the standard advice given on this board, and I'm pretty aware of that. I'm cautiously optimistic about the outcome. Of course she's ready to get married tomorrow. But that's the enthusiasm of youth speaking. I'm a bit more jaded and am glad it's going to take some time.

Let me be clear about that point. I don't doubt her heart, or her feelings, or her motivations. I just think she's wildly optimistic. Probably like I was when I was her age. She has a good heart, and a good temperament. Though all weekend I referred to her as 'Mi Tirana.' Strong opinions, strong heart, strong mind. She wants her way, but then again don't we all.

She was very concerned for my security and the security of my possessions. I carry a shoulder bag (a purse in manly guise). When it would hang at my side, she would chide me about carrying it more to the front, point and say "Seguridad". So much so that it became a running joke. "Luza: Seguridad. Tony: Si, mi tirana."

Another running theme, "Luza: Tony are you happy? Tony: Si, muy bien." This from a woman who barely speaks any English and a man who speaks even less Spanish.

I will also add I purchased before I left a $80 English/Spanish Electronic Dictionary. I had thought I was buying a translator, but I misread the label. Single word E/S dictionary. Still it was immensely helpful.

The interesting thing is that we've been talking on line by chat for most of the last year. As a result we each can read and write more of the others language then we can speak. I understand very very little of spoken Spanish. However, I can read much more.

As part of my own travel process, I kept a room at the hotel San Fernando Real For the entire stay. That was my safety net. First I kept all my valuables in the safe at the hotel. My passport, my drivers license, my credit cards, my car registration, all my official documents stayed in the hotel, in the safe. The only things I carried with me in my wallet where a debit card, one old expired credit card and photo copy of the front page of my passport. The expired card was meant as a decoy, to offer in case of robbery. Luckily this was an unnecessary precaution.

The second purpose of the room was my personal safety. On a first trip, no matter how much you think you know someone and the situation you can never be sure. So I wanted a rabbit hole I could return to in care I needed to leave her family's home for any reason I felt required it. Again this proved to be unnecessary, but I felt much more at ease knowing I had it available.

Finally in the safe I had my safety cash. Enough to be sure that were I to lose my wallet I would have access to enough cash to get a ride to the airport and get my car out of long term parking. Enough to get home.

I think Luza thought I was some kind of innocent babe in the woods, not really aware of how to deal with Colombia and the dangers she worries about. At one point I had withdrawn about 200,000COP from an ATM. We were getting ready to go out and she asked me for my wallet, indicating that she wanted to show me something. At that point I took out the wallet and offered it to her. She took out about 10,000COP and then pointed at the rest to indicate that we would only need a small amount, and that I shouldn't carry the whole amount with us.

I nodded and took the rest of the money out, folded it over and put it in the upper portion of my sock, a place unlikely to be found in a robbery. In case of a robbery I now had enough in the wallet to satisfy someone so that it wouldn't escalate, but still had enough safely "hidden" that I felt comfortable I would have the cash I needed if I wanted to shop. This was a habit I learned living in NYC long ago.

I think that move, "money in the sock" raised her level of confidence in my ability to deal with life in her Colombia.

PS More to come later.