Need feedback on Barranquilleras

[DJ Arnoldo]

Originally Posted by DennisLevy

Duke...
I think the greatest undiscovered treasure in Colombia is mature women!!!!!..

That's deep...and good advice. Women dont seem to grow up until at least 35, even in Colombia.

[TBOND]

Salmon sorry for the loss of your mom, you have my condolences… and sorry for the break up with your Novia...

You did the right thing... your Novia’s two gems come across as being very selfish. While you are dealing with the emotional loss of your mom you do not need any extra weight... you need support. I find that Colombian women tend to depend on their men much more then their American counter parts. The women worth keeping will recognize when not to lean on you financially and in times like this will have some compassion. The ones who are not worth keeping simply do not care and will ask you for money even if buildings are exploding all around you. Good call, you are on the fast track to finding the type of woman you deserve.

TBOND

[PEPE_USMC]

I will go a step beyond and say this is general MACHISMO and MARIANISMO. The bringing the honor guest/s to protect the women of the family. This also exists in Peru and Bolivia. Jeez, according to a few of my frineds, this occurred in Madrid also. I remember when I took my ex-wife to Cusco for a few days. Her mother was so upset at her they didn't talk for a week. Although at the time, Gianni was 25 and I was 22, neither Mom or Dad liked the idea. Her sister and her boyfriend offered to go, but their work schedules didn't permit it to happen that way. Eventually the mother loosened the grip, but we had to call at certain times of the night.

I asked why it was a big deal because her family was quite familiar with US culture and semi-indoctrinated their children in it. Her and all of her sisters spoke English and watched mainly US made movies and listened to US music. Anyway, the reply was that since we both worked at the same building, her mother was afraid it would hurt her honor and fall back on the family. For some reason, for latino parents, sex just doesn't happen when a sister tags along with a boyfriend. They and we know that it just means two couples are going to probably have sex, but everybody else will think the sister protected the virgin honor.

The worst thing that could happen is you are forced to go on a trip with a girl and her brother. I have a close friend in Peru who married a lady with a brother who absolutely hated his gringo guts. Strangely, at every family gathering the brother tried to point out everything bad that my friend did to the father. Luckily, the father saw the good in my friend and they are still happily married today. Still, about three years ago while in Peru, he and his wife went back for Christmas. They went to a bar and then returned to her family's home. Her brother was there and drunk and started poking my friend in his chest. He asked him nicely to stop and go sleep it off. Unfortunately, it came down to fists and my friend got a little retribution for all of the years of name calling and insults. But, it fixed the problem he had with the brother-in-law. He apologized to the family and they were actually trying to apologize to him for the poor representation that their son had of the family.

So, the issue of tag-alongs happens through-out the continent. It is actually a part of the older Spanish culture. But, it seems to be dying off as time passes and globalization starts to take hold.

[John Wayne]

This is an interesting thread guy's ....

Tagalong's will be always at our door steps.....

For those of us that are not bums and layabouts.....

But Fu*ke 'em.......

Any one here have their input how to handle it?

[PEPE_USMC]

After my first trip, things died down and it got easier. My secret was getting the mother and grandmother to have total trust in me. After that I could do no wrong. Even today, my former mother-in-law blames the divorce on my ex-wife. Overall, it is getting the trust of the women of the family. If they know you have good intentions, they are usually more accepting of alone time. However, if they get one bad vibe, they put on the chastity belt. Act innocent and get in good with the two highest women in the family, Mami y Mamama (Abuela). I know this is hard, especially due to the fact that people perceive things differently. It is also something that is time consuming.

That at least allows the family to give you some space, but I think Whitey said it best. You are going to have to put in some family time with soon to be in-laws if you are serious about latin women. They are very dependent on their men and families. There are few better mothers, but they are extremely family oriented. Also, if they have kids, you have got to treat them better than you would your own. They will give you space, once they have trust in your intentions and no you are committed.

[colombia]

I went through the same thing when I first met my wife in Barranquilla. Colombian families are very protective, but they are also very welcoming if you are respectful. Colombia is a bit old-fashioned, which is actually kind of nice. Colombian women are definitely worth the effort, so the initial time you spend getting to know her and her family will work to your benefit!