Thanksgiving in Costa Rica

[Jim]

Hi Gringos

I just got back from four days in Costa Rica and think I may have some interesting observations.

One of the key components of the experience for me is talking Spanish. I spent my college junior year in France and have always loved languages since then. I started learning Spanish two years later when I had a Costa Rican girlfriend. This is a major reason why I want to live in Costa Rica next year, to use Spanish and to work in a foreign country. This is not for everyone.

Costa Rica is not a good place to find a wife to bring back to the US. I’ve met lots of ladies. Some have great jobs that situation is more rare for Colombians due to their economy. The country is at peace and they feel comfortable there. Latin women in general are tired of their machisto men but that doesn’t make them trust gringos as being less macho. Latin women have gotten the short end of the stick for sometime. Norteaños may offer more potential but for a Costa Rican woman to trust a man enough to abandon her life and follow him to the US would take lots of time and trust. The reason it happens more frequently in Colombia is that the economy and 40 year civil war make the situation more desperate for the women.

Prostitution is legal in Latin America and I think it makes the non-working women more conscious of sex in a monetary context. Nidia was not a whore in any way but I do believe she considered sex a necessary concession to get what she wanted. She had had a loveless marriage and didn’t enjoy sex. The majority of latin women do enjoy sex and using it to get what they want is not a difficult decision at all.

The first person I met in Colombia, Eresvey, worked for Latin Love. She was really bright and I enjoyed talking to her. Nidia met her through me and when Nidia was here in March 2001, we called her and introduced her to someone I worked with. They stayed in phone and E-mail contact for over a year and finally met in Cali in June, 2002. They were planning to spend a week in San Andres this Christmas. Ken doesn’t believe in credit cards so he sent her about $2000 to pay for deposits on rooms, her air fare etc. I think you all know what happens next. The money arrives but no reservations are paid. That would appear to anyone (except Ken) as outright thievery. She placed the $2000 above seeing him and also lied about it.

In March 2001 when I wired $2000 to Colombia, I knew I was paying Nidia’s bills. She told me she’d stay here forever and two days later she “had” to return home. Her explanation made sense at the time but in retrospect I should have written off the $2000 and run. A whore is preferable to Nidia because at least a whore doesn’t lie

Costa Rican women seem so rational in that they are not anxious to leave their country. I certainly rushed my situation by a lot but the biggest mistake I made was ignoring warning signs. Red flags are subject to being ignored if you think with your heart or with the small head. Just remember gringos, it’s a buyer’s market and you are the buyer. Work on your Spanish every day and insist that she do the same. In my advanced ESL class, I have fourteen Mexicans, 2 Colombians, a German, a French Canadian, a Chinese and a Vietnamese. Four of the top five students are the four who do not speak Spanish. It’s so easy for a Spanish speaker to speak mostly Spanish and Nidia had a enormous amount of Colombians friends living in the US who knew how to beat the system. Trust me that you don’t want to select the wrong woman.

Hope there is a useful tidbit or two here which you can use

Pura Vida,

Jim

Thanks for this mini-report Jim! [img]smile.gif[/img]

[chopper1970]

hi jim
sorry to hear about that but a learning experience nonetheless tks for the report it seems that the more gringos go to lam the more they try to get over on us well as steve miller said in the 70"s go on take the money and run!!!
adios bud