Reporte mi manjo!

[Cap'n Jib]

Reporte mi manjo!

When it comes to driving in Latin America, one important point to remember is ‘there ain’t no rules’….well hardly any to speak of that is.

Stop signs [Alto] are ignored with impunity. Traffic lights are obeyed for the most part…unless they are not. What differentiates driving in Latin America from the US is that The Flow rules over the rules of the road. The big cities usually come the closest to driving in the US….sort of. In small towns, however, The Flow definitelyrules!

By The Flow, it can mean the movement or rhythm of the traffic. However, the second meaning is the most common one and refers to the almost total lack of concentration, stoned out of your mind/comatose mental condition that is necessary to survive driving in Latin America.

What in the hell was that gesture?
This ‘zoned’ status also refers to the police. In the US, we have an understanding of hand signals use by the police to perform their duties. In fact, these signals are often contained in the driving manuals and are required reading to obtain a license. There is a small difference in Latin America which I will try to explain. Experienced gringos should have NO difficulties in getting the first two questions correct.

For all illustrations it is a male police officer who has:

One hand in the air
In the US, this is usually a signal to stop. In Latin America, it could mean 1) he is waiving to the chica in the car behind you, 2) trying to determine which way the wind is blowing, or 3) trying to show how many cans of beer he consumed the night before.

A backward motion of the hand at head level.
In Latin America, this normally means 1) he is attempting to smooth back his hair to impress the chica in the car behind you, 2) he sees his reflection in your windshield and want to impress a possible chica in the car behind you or 3) a wasp or bee was buzzing around his head and he was trying to shoo it away.


Both arms extended palms down, ad waist level, (as if pushing down on something).
In the US, we would take this to mean slow down or stop. In Latin America, he is signaling to the chica in the car behind you to stop. He is NOT signaling to you. In fact he hasn’t even noticed you. Do you think do you think everything is about YOU?

A flicking of the wrist at waste level.
This is not a gesture used in normal traffic control but rather an attempt to remove some mucus from his fingers.

A bending at the waste with a crossing of both arms in a swing motion.
To the untrained eye gringo eye, this is uncannily like a safe sign in baseball. In Latin America, this is definitely a sign to the chica in the car behind you that “Hey baby, you’re safe with me…je..je!”

Kicked a clump of dirt with his boot in an uncaring manner.
This is another sign specifically to the chica in the car behind you meaning “Hey baby you’re not that hot. I’d kick your ass to the curb…if we had curbs.”


So here in Latin America, a driver pretty much does what he likes. Cool!

However, just to be safe, I asked a local how does a person really knows, if the cop wants the driver to stop or not? His reply, “If they shoot at you….then you will know!” Can’t argue there.

[LastLion]

Great summarization Cap'n... It makes me think that countries in LAM could easily solve their economic woes, just by enforcing traffic laws...

What is really fun is being in the back of a taxi after midnight, when red lights mean only go as fast as you can thru them, look both ways and hope someone that is doing the exact same thing doesn't run into your ass..

I have driven in Panama, mexico and costa rica.. All were a little more tame, compared to CALI, or Bogota. Bucaramanga on the other hand, I am not sure why but it seams they actually take into consideration the signals and laws..

I remember being in BOGOTA, in the back of a taxi, and seeing this women who for some reason was parked sideways in the middle of a main carreterra, obviously having a bogota driving mental breakdown. There must of been at least 20 cars honking at her and people screaming at her.. Well this was not helping nor working, she was ready for a mental ambulance to come and take her to mental asylum. Obviously she was so flustered she couldnt even drive..

I saw a guy get out to help her and all jhe did was coax her into driving 10 feet forward so everyone else could get by than he left her there to complete her mental breakdown only blocking one lane, got back in his car and left..

I have a question for those well travelled LAM drivers. Which city is the most dangerous city in your opinion to drive in, not because of the danger of the city, but because of the danger of the cities drivers??

[JMitch1959]

That's funny Jib,
My wife likes all the rules of the road, and how they're enforced here. Me I admire those Cali drivers. I think many of them have reflexes of race car drivers. And, I agree trying to determine the rules of the road in Cali would be more difficult than learning to speak the language. I hope to never drive there. It reminds me of a huge nest of ants. They're running all over the place with alacrity. Interestingly, I have not witnessed many accidents while I've been there.

I do like having the perogative to obey traffic laws. Nothing worse than being stuck at a stop light in a deserted metropolitan area at night, and the light stuck on red. And now, with those damn cameras they can snap your picture and mail you a ticket, and the private corporation gets paid based on how many tickets that are issued. Quite the pain in the ass.
The only thing worse than that is the patronizing prick who wants to give you a lecture when he writes the ticket.

Being able to drink a cold beer in a taxi, and not being ticketed for child constraints, seat belts, etc. is another small joy of visiting Cali.

I prefer Cali in that respect. But I'm sure there's some middleground for traffic enforcement.

[DennisLevy]

In Bogota, there is only one rule of the rule of the road and the rule is that there are no rules.

Ive seen things that literally dropped my jaw. One of my favorites was the taxi driver waiitng at a traffic light on a major avenue in Bogota, he pulled out of the line passed 12 cars on the left, (I counted them!) and when the light turned green he cut off the lead car and made a left!

[John Wayne]

What did JB say?......

Were you born an asshole, or did you work it all your life........

I even hate waiting in lines here....Nobody respects nothing.....

[Benjio]

LOL!!!! Classic....

[Ciza29]

Having driven all over the place in Mexico City, I would say it is much easier than it seems and much safer than the US. How can that be? Simple, everyone is on the same page. Every driver is aggressive so you know exactly what they are going to do. Pretty much every driver pays attention when they drive because they know if you aren't paying attention something bad always happens. If there are 3 lanes but 4 cars can fit across you know there will be four cars. At major intersections you know people are going to be turning from atleast 3 lanes so you weave your way through.

Driving is so easy in the US that most of the drivers are bored and doing some other activity. Also when you mix passive drivers and aggressive drivers you are never sure what is going to happen. Watch what happens at a 4 way stop when a passive driver doesn't take their turn then nobody is sure when they are going to take it and if they should go or not?

[Micky10]

LL -

These poor people can not afford tickets. Example - A ticket for not wearing a seat belt is "one months salary!", no ****! These are used to "their way" of driving and it does work for them. Medellin has a lot of traffic, and considering style and number, there are very few accidents.

Love - Micky

[JMitch1959]

A lot of people here can't really afford tickets either. If you think about it are system is pretty _____ up. We pay taxes to put traffic cops on the roads, so they can give us tickets, and then the insurance companies can whack us with higher insurance rates that increases their bottom line, and makes are lives more difficult.

I know. It's nice having traffic cops for a lot of other reasons. And, if someone is being an ______ it's good to have them around to give them a ticket etc. But, by and large I think we could do with fewer if they don't have anything better to do than hide out so they can catch us doing something horribly wrong like going 35 in a 25. Or coasting down a mountain road etc. I think it's more of a common sense system. I don't think a belligerent, _____ driver would probably live long there. Anyway, if I had to choose I prefer the Colombian rules of the road.

And, also without the all the lawyers making a living off liability lawsuits. Life just seems simpler there in many respects, and more fun. That's another subject, I guess.

[LastLion]

Originally Posted by Micky10

LL -

These poor people can not afford tickets.

\\

You would think that maybe they would drive better than.. hahha

SOunds like maybe thte cops have some mercy there.. Or a quick 10 o 20 mil will get you out of anthing.

Well in all honesty I had to pay a ticket today, walked into the damn courthouse, begged for mercy, but to no avail. I guess the old those stop signs (apparently 3 of them) weren't there when I was a kid didn't go over to well with the judge.

Got lucky got out of 3 tickets in the past year I was well over due..

I think I could handle the driving in LAM